Romans 10:9
wow, i came to school this morning and i didn't even realize it was july 4th until my mouse pointer rolled over the time on my taskbar (yeah). anyway, it kinda just got me thinking about how special this holiday is to me personally. see, i was raised in a good Christian home, where I went to Sunday school every week and learned the language of Christianity. ask me any religious question, and i likely had a good answer for you. i accepted Christ when i was 5, through my mother (bless her soul), and was baptized at the age of 7. however, while i know that God saved me at that young age, the memory of that time was like a blur. by the time i was 15, with all the sermons i've heard and church functions and stuff that i've been to, i must have said the sinner's prayer a million times and rededicated my life a billion times. but people are always talking about spiritual birthdays, or remembering the day God saved you and you were reborn (spiritually). i honestly could not think of one day, one moment, where i clearly, in my mind and spirit, met and spoke to God, accepting His Son as my Lord and Savior (from sin, death, and eternal punishment). i started thinking, so what does that mean? the doubts started to come and i began to second guess my own salvation. so in the summer of 1999, i went on a retreat with my friend's church, and the main speaker was pastor ed ormeo, a pastor from california. he always delivered great messages, but on the second night of that retreat, his sermon spoke to me in an unexpected way. the theme of the camp was something to the effect of being on fire for God (all i remember is a flame on the t-shirt), and i can hardly remember what the overall message that night was about, but here's what spoke to me: pastor ed was telling us about these two missionaries who were imprisoned (for their faith) and chained in these extremely small cells. the cells, which were side by side, were only long and wide enough for them to be standing up straight. they couldn't move their arms, lay down, or do anything. all the way at the top of the cell there was no roof. so pastor ed was saying how on one particular night, they looked up and saw the stars in the heavens and began singing the hymn "how great thou art" with all of their might.
O Lord my God, when i in awesome wonder,
consider all, the worlds Thy Hands have made;
i see the stars, i hear the rolling thunder,
Thy power throughout, the universe displayed.
he started singing it. i sat there looking at the ground. then he gets to the chorus..
then sings my soul, my Saviour God, to Thee,
how great Thou art, how great Thou art.
then sings my soul, my Saviour God, to Thee,
how great Thou art, how great, Thou, art!
and i dunno, the words just hit me, and i began to tear. a lot. because when i began to sing along in my heart, the message of the hymn just humbled me and broke me. the testimony of those two guys made me realize how little of a deal God was in my life, when He should have been everything to me. and being in the middle of nowhere (geographically speaking), God's greatness and power, and the beauty of His creation, dawned on me like never before. pastor ed gave an alter call that night. i didn't walk up to the front, but i did make a decision. i decided to drop all the uncertainty and doubt about my salvation, and keep this night as the one night that i could look back on and say yes, there was a moment in my life where i can remember distinctly asking God to save me, understanding what that meant with all of my heart. a night that i confessed my sins (past, present, and future) and accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior, asking Him to change me from the inside out. of course, the changing part was a process that would take years (scratch that, He is still changing me daily). but i knew, and God knew, that He had His hand on my life. and later on down the road, when things got bad and I did things that went way too far, God would show me that He never did or could leave me, or even give up on me, because i was His child. a sealed and done deal, because He promised it, and God never breaks His promises.
i was saved at the age of 5 (1988), thanks to my mom, and while i did not fully surrender my life to Him until 2004, it was on July 4th, 1999 that i felt freedom from doubt, and claimed personal certainty for my salvation.
-independence day-
) to see my original dance crew : : .
(you'd get it if you knew what situs inversus was). the girls came in 2nd, though they really could have won it all. they were so smart, absorbing everything we taught. it was a good day to grab and have amidst harder times. thank God for being able to still use us when we are hardly feel qualified.
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